Ep. 158 Jingle Tits

Merry Christmas, ya twats!!! Join us for some holiday songs (really), poems (yes, really), and the joy of the season all mixed up with our usual inappropriateness & perversions! We love you & wish you a VERY special Christmas!!! Squinches!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/qmox915a0k1bs54/158firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 157 Pregnancy Rage

Rage out (pregnancy rage, that is!) with us this week about topics such as: the possibility of Sith Binx, mad wild turkeys, and the delicate blue thongs of hillbillies! Enjoy, we love you!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/89y9asvepzjtyfm/157firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 156 A Long Pussy

Recorded in front of a live studio audience (of one), this week's episode is full of something... Surprises, mostly! Mandy's tale of tummy terror, the fact that tragedy makes us hate everyone, and resurrecting old but precious scandals are just a few of the delights we treat you too! Enjoooy it!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/rjbijy13e00cuz2/156firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 155 The Fuck Flag

To be totally honest, I can't remember everything we talked about this week... I do remember there was a lot more racial stuff than usual (all in good fun of course), a dude that assaulted his lady with some antlers, and a couple of failed bits that still made us laugh. Please to enjoy this!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/61ku1r0sg11c3oa/155firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 154 The Cucumber Menace

Happy Thanksgiving! Boy will you be THANKFUL for this episode full of table showers, gay cows, and Dan's passionate defense of Timothy Dalton's dashing good looks. We also play everyone's favorite game, Filth Feud! It's fun, enjoy it!!!!!!!!!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/cp8wspgdl5n4csy/154firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 153 God Pocket

Ideas! We're just full of em!!! Ideas about how Charlie Sheen aquired his AIDS (and how to cure it), what to name a lady's downstairs, and why Mickey Mouse's ears are shaped that way (he loves tits)... Also other stuff that you will definitely ENJOY!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/ls1yiiclqqb388e/153firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 152 Biscuits n' Gravy

We're back for a short little episode that is long on hilarity!!! We talked our usual nonsense, about the nastiest weird news story we may have ever encountered, how Dan learned to stop worrying and just speak in tongues, and THE BIGGEST ANNOUNCEMENT IN FIRNECAST HISTORY!!!!!! Do NOT miss this!!! And enjoy it!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/xnpce8e9kmr98jl/152firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 151 KILL DOZER

Heads are just for making goofy noises, the great stupid person accent controversy of 2015, our grandma's rockin bikini body, and so much more await your ears this week!!! Get this in your ears quick, before it's gone! Enjooooy!!!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/zazm3bnu2v5m8sa/151firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 150 Ding Dong Tallywhacker

We celebrate our 150th episode the right way, by barely acknowledging it. We also do a lot of singing, introduce the most amazing presidential ticket of all time, discover Dan's one true talent in life, and give you the lessons in morality you so sorely need if you are listening to this show. ENJOY, because we love you!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/y3050vygnvyr7yf/150firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 149 My Wuzzit

Flatulent guys deserve employment, too! Not only that, but Donald Sutherland pronounces bosom weirdly, there is an American Association of Nude Recreation, and the Duck Dynasty clan is NOT full of wisdom. Enjoy this episode, won't you??? Muah!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/keg8lwxj3j4bzbh/149firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 148 Pee Sex

Dan's back, back again! Yes he's back, tell a friend (really, we could use some new listeners)! We talked about all kinds of stuff this week. An update on the angry comedy dentist, the definition of private parts, and the romantic world of "water work". Enjooooy!!! Kisses!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/ogbqjhko0r6ohoa/148firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 147 Grumpypants Bitchface

It's a show full of angry comedy dentists, sibling assisted suicide, interpretive racism, and consensual groping! And all kinds of other stuff that you do NOT want to miss, because if you do you'll be that lame-o that doesn't get the inside jokes. Enjoy!!! Enjoy, I say!!! Kisses!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/sp34qggkn2tvd1q/147firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 146 Treasured Mineral

Oh, it's a doozy this week, guys! A real doozy! We talk about Rue McClanahan-ing, crude instruments, and the Duggar's secret sex code. We also dissolve into laughter at a certain point, but you like it when we do that, don't you? Don't you?!!! Please to enjoy this! Love you!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/3m812ck9o77akp6/146firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 145 Crotch Hopper

Donald Trump 2016, folks! Oh yes, we give you an in-depth discussion of his political prospects, classiness, and penis size this week! Plus, we talk about dead bats, solve the mystery of a missing corpse, and Dan does something so horrifying you'll just have to listen to find out because I can't discuss it. Just ew. Anyway, eeeenjoy this!!!! Muah!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/shrdujt4lu1jxyv/145firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 144 Urinary Meatus

Sex pistols, geriatric pleasure tools, and beach whackers, oh my!!! Not only that, but we have a very special edition of Mandy's High School Poetry Corner that you don't want to miss... It was embarrassing, painful, and perhaps slightly illegal. Eeeenjoy thisssss!!!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/s16j58rd3w7f5ay/144firnecast2final.mp3

Ep. 143 The Wubba

He's back, baby!!!! The "triumphant" return of Dan!!!!!! We got all caught up on the doin's and whatnots of the last two months, talked about old ladies and their carnal pleasures, and generally had a hoot and a holler! Enjoy this!!!!!!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/gofddwozeitqbsb/143firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 004 Dry Hump Jack

This week we are still Dan-less, but it's ok because we have Matt & Joe from The Lotuscast to fill the void! The sound is a little iffy, but bear with us, it's worth it I promise!!! We talked about the epic struggle of man vs. gator, the weird way Joe pleasures himself while driving, and we play everybody's favorite/least favorite game, Blood or Semen?! Enjoy this!!!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/6858qo2s9a9x01x/004BonertimeComplete.mp3

Ep. 003 Lonely Ladies Wine Club Returns!

The Lonely Ladies have returned this week with plenty of sass, wine, and vaginas to spare! Join them as they wildly speculate about celebrity penis size, sour some grapes, and give the best sex advice EVER!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/zxqfn69q050w4um/Lonely_Ladies_1001.mp3

Ep. 002 FirneHeads

Look out world, it's the bold return of everybody's favorite dead podcast, The Squarehead Kids!!! Deck, Jay, Little Ricky, and of course, me, trying to control the chaos. It was fun, you should listen!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/8oco6e5mhm1se8g/FirneHeads.mp3

Ep. 001 Boner Time!

Well, folks, Dan has abandoned us this week so Jay, Jim, Jim's extremely offensive friend Treesap, and I did whatever we wanted! We lashed out at Dan because we missed him, we interviewed Treesap and were horrified by the results and repudiate them with all our hearts, and generally had lots of fun! You will enjoy this! I know you miss Dan and we do too, but we'll make ya laugh if ya let us!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/ppzt4ez887bx1kk/001BonerTimeFinal.mp3

Ep. 142 Cock Weight

The best/most accurate way to measure tallywhackers, having a bee fetish, and the complicated matter of public pooping are just a few of the topics we discuss this week... Other topics we don't write in the description for fear you'll judge us. It's a mystery. A mystery you can only solve by listening. So listen! You'll enjooooooy it!!!!!!! ♥

http://www.mediafire.com/download/sv6sbca4kmj9gsm/142firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 141 Cahoots!

Oooh, there were some cahoots going on this week. Big time. What cahoots and who was in them? Oh, you'll find out... Aside from the cahoots, there were terrible revelations made about the entire male gender and we discuss the eternal consequences of self-pleasure (hand babies!!!). Enjoy please!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/w0uiu7l7zcxrorl/141firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 140 ToiletSnakeApocalypse

In addition to in-depth conversation about the most pressing, urgent danger facing our generation (the scourge of the toilet snake), we also talked about these fine things: the feature film Dumpster Baby, heroic bear punching, and Mandy's High School Poetry Corner. But mostly the snake thing. So join us on the road to great adventure and listen! And enjoy! Muah!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/bwbv9k6v3v6xf1p/140firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 139 Fuzzy Headed Conqueror

Hold on to your chakras and get ready for some stuff this week! That's right, stuff. This stuff: toilet snake apocalypse, in depth coverage of the Game of Thrones controversy, and the similarity between coffee beans and lady parts. You will enjoy this, most likely! Yay!!! ♥

http://www.mediafire.com/download/wh9r1orfyddgw9e/139firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 138 Fundle

Not only are we clearing out the brain lint this week, we're setting that sh*t on FIRE, just like grandpa taught us!!! We answer the following supremely important questions: "who does "it" better, Kurt or Billy?", "what would happen if Mandy went to Burning Man, took peyote, and found out her spirit animal was a hippo?", "what's a twat punch?" Enjoyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!! Hugs! Kisses!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/77tat96384l768d/138firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 137 Sugar Chicken

Snuggle close to your favorite sugar chicken and get ready for a particularly silly show... One of the most embarrassing poems in the history of Mandy's High School Poetry Corner is revealed, a jockey loses his pants, and we find out that there is a bone you just can't adjust yourself. Enjoy it!!!! ♥

http://www.mediafire.com/download/g5chh0y0rc9adb6/137firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 136 Wiggle Wiggle Waggle

The game show everyone (Mandy) loves, Firnecast Filth Feud, is BACK this week and better (worse) than ever! Not only that, but we chat about Jay's elaborate nether grooming habits, a new character called Herpe the Hippo, and we debut a new drop on the soundboard that will blow. your. mind.! Enjoy, you can't help it cause it's fun!!!! Yay!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/no4rqu7wryihyg7/136firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 135 Heritage Valley Beaver Hospital

"I can feel my eggs swelling," is a quote from Dan that you will only fully appreciate if you listen to the show! You can also fully appreciate the dangerous combination of fire ants and nudity, what Madonna's mouth tastes like, and the best damn beaver hospital in the country! Enjoooy, loves!!!! ♥

http://www.mediafire.com/download/jvcuvqpb8q09a6g/135firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep.134 Ass Butt

We're giving you a golden ticket to fun this week, folks! Oh yes, this ticket entitles you to: the explosive revelation from THE JINX that the media is too scared to talk about, a short musical about the love between a sheepherder and his best gal Lanolin, and the most important invention of our generation, the Barf Barrier! Buy the ticket, take the ride! And eeeenjoy ittttt!!!! ♥

http://www.mediafire.com/download/25gv62s6lxsi6f9/134firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep.133 4 SknLuv

Wowee! This show was chocked full of things to horrify and appall you! We analyze circumcision rituals, find out the newest slang terms for drugs from our good friends over at Scientology, and we have a follow up on that weird old man from Craig's List that wanted you to bring him truckers to rub. Listen, and EEEENNNNJJJOOOOYYYY IIITTTT lovedy do you all! Derp derp derp!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/jrg864399rvvb33/132firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 132 Irish Swim Trunks

Which podcast covered the Robert Durst story before anyone else and has six thumbs?! THIS ONE. Aside from bragging about ourselves, we also chit chat about the Irish curse (and accompanying swim trunks), and we bring you another installment of the bosom-heaving you crave: Grandma's Porn!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/iiv4izxmo2uk32x/132firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 131 Pussy Fingers

Boy howdy! This week's episode was filled with all sorts of nonsense that we are just SURE you will love to pieces. We revisit our energy drink manufacturing friend, discuss a lady with vagina berries on her finger tips, and debut a new segment, Grandma's Porn! Listen, and enjoy, won't you! Love love love and squinch squinch squinch! Blah! That's how Mandy usually writes these things, right?

http://www.mediafire.com/download/xk8ikx4az2h29yu/131firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 130 Patches the Marijuana Clown

It's a wild one this week, folks, so hold on to your butts! We discuss the so-called "marijuana stores" in Colorado, Mandy getting called fat by a guy who has to wear a helmet, and a very special guest drops by to give Dan alcohol and Mandy nothing. Eeeenjoy!!! It!!! Enjoy it!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/6bwr51zcgve0b4n/130firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 129 The Knights of Weenor

We mark this week with the triumphant return of Producer Jay! Yes, he is still alive and seemingly Ebola free, but may have gotten stuck in a lady during his travels. We had some funs discussing the  male proclivity for sticking their wieners in random objects, a mailbox sex update, and the Bugs Bunny gay agenda consipracy! Eeeenjoy!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/rladiwii52thsy0/129firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 128 The Hoard

A terrifying bowel movement is just the tip of the iceberg in yet another thrilling episode of.... This show! We also give you an update on the dreaded mother daughter luncheon, and our friends at WFOD surprise Mandy with something very very special! Enjoy!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/4kzwuwqowuxpf6x/128firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 127 God Rasslin'

Did you know that there are some things in the Bible that are pretty darn gay? Or that our beloved Shoshoni cat man has a deep love of... Oh who am I kidding? I don't remember what we talked about at all. Except the Bible gay stuff. Just listen, it's the usual silliness. It's fun! Enjoy it!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/fuw5uennetmvn3j/127firnekastfinal.mp3

Ep. 126 Boobin' Right w/ guest Mike Moore from Wheelbarrow Full of Dicks!

We are joined this week by dear friend and wonderful person Mike Moore of the Wheelbarrow Full of Dicks internet radio program! We talk about folks who sex trees, folks who sex rocks, folks who sex mountains, folks who sex horses, and folks who sex mailboxes! We talk about other fun stuff too, so you should definitely listen! And eeeenjooooyyyyy!!!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/qymgo6gnrpe5riv/126firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep.125 Fuzzy Britches

There are a lot of sick people in this world... One of them is on this podcast! (hint: it's Dan) We talked about some horses and their lovers, some issues going on in the polar bear community (please donate to our new charity, Save the Polar Dicks!), and also the awkward changes one will go through during that thing they call puberty. STAY TUNED for our glorious Easter Egg!!! You won't regret it!!!! Enjoy.

http://www.mediafire.com/download/h8141q91v3g44a8/125firnecastfinal.mp3

P.S. Mandy, you aren't supposed to TELL people about the Easter Egg. That's what makes it an Easter Egg. GOD. --Dan.

Ep. 124 AKA happy ending :)

Knock knock, you about to get shell shocked in this week's super fun time episode! We explore the seedy underbelly of our fair town's Craigslist M2M ads (Age: 67, Sex: M, Body type: Heavy), Dan gives some incredibly bizarre and, quite frankly, horrible relationship advice, and we try to save the world by euthanizing anyone who has ever slept with Dustin Diamond. Enjooooy!!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/9qqoefhogn270ay/124firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 123 Dannywood

How would you describe lady parts to an alien? We have the answer to this and other questions, such as: Who was a real bitch bag in Ten Sleep High School in 1997? Is it wrong to critique the performances of children in school plays on YouTube? What ever became of beloved Shoshoni cat man L.J. Faith? Listen and enjoy, friends!!!! ♥

http://www.mediafire.com/download/1vco1lt0lcii0ul/123firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 122 Mucho Vajina

"You can't eat AIDS," is just one of the amazing nuggets of wisdom we sprinkle onto the yogurt of your beautiful brains this week! We also talked about Santa's personal trainer, The Masturbatory Habits of the Middle Aged Man, and the similarities between lady bits and Robert Duvall's neck. You will enjoy this show if you're that kind of person!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/rxrc34am5ug7euu/122firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 121 David Icke Was Right

Dan is all fired up this week about the Sony hack (timely!), unions (?!), and he also called me a cow (no surprises there). We also talked about so many other things that I can't remember right now, but you are sure to enjoy it! So listen!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/88405c1p4b0cbgc/2PrerecordFirnecast.mp3

Ep. 120 Whoopie Goldberg Farts

Did you know that Dan published a women's quarterly magazine called Penis Pages? Well, he did, and you'll be surprised to find out the celebrity that made his first nude appearance in it! We also discussed Whoopie Goldberg's air biscuits for 20 minutes... Yes, it was 20 minutes. Please to enjoy, we love you!!!

http://www.mediafire.com/download/lyhk5k8tn1nfu8r/118firnecast.mp3