Ep. 32 Bodily Gasses

What could be finer than sharing your day with a couple of men in suits discussing bodily emissions? Absolutely nothing, we say! So join us for this, and much, much more. Topics such as nipple sunglasses, Chinga Chavin, and dead cats in boxes will fill your ears with fun!!!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast32/32firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 31 Jingle Balls

In this very special Christmas episode, you'll find us discussing such heart-warming holiday topics as hillbilly porn, wall balls, and Kim Jong 2: The Sequel. Let us in your ears to sing inappropriate Christmas carols, roast some chestnuts, and make some merry!!! It's like egg nog for your soul!!!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast31/31firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 30 Ghost Log

The time has come for us to break the glass on our "emergency episode"! We've been saving this one for a special occasion, and lucky for you, this is it! Our very special guest Joe "Joey Boots" Barbuto is back to tell us about his days as a fedora-wearing ghost hunter.  We also talk about scary sex dolphins, Scientology bunkers, and Japanese boob prejudices. *Note* Some of our squinches and news stories may be a teensy tinsy bit outdated, but you'll enjoy them anyway! Or else!!!

 http://archive.org/download/Firnecast30/firnecastfinal30.mp3

Ep. 29 A New Low

Warning: This episode is not just explicit... It is double explicit... It is explicit in a way that makes Mandy truly uncomfortable. Why? Well, listen and find out, if you dare!!! Coconut testicles, more bad English accents, and butt teeth are just a few of the high-brow topics we discuss. Enjoy? Well, try to anyway!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast29/29firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 28 Hooha Bomb!

It's worth listening to this episode just for the bizarre mouth-related story... It's also worth listening to this episode to find out how many monocles a penis needs and what Dan's new hit single is called. Enjoy this episode. Enjoy it good!!!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast28/28firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 27 The Warmest Mittens

(Warning: Walking Dead spoilers contained in this episode) "My body is a change machine," is just one of the hilarious quotes you'll enjoy if you tune in to this, the 27th episode of The Firnecast.  You will also be enlightened about some very special homemade mittens, the wrong kind of massage, and mullet tops. Also, Alan Rickman joins us for a few minutes. Get on it (listening to this, I mean)!!!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast27/27firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 26 Voter AIDS

Welcome, welcome friends, to an hour of human udders, podcast mating, and timely Krang impressions. We'll also tell you our favorite euphemisms for breasts and the new charity Dan has invented to benefit disillusioned voters. Doesn't that sound fun?

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast26/26firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 25 Stone Lips w/ Special Guest Carman

Mullet mockery, ball cleavage, and chronically misunderstanding irony are just a few of the fascinating subjects covered in this week's episode.  You may even find yourself dancing to the beat of "Oppa Camel Toe!" if you're lucky. Please enjoy responsibly (with your ears)!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast25/25firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 24 Jam Jar

"Hey Gramma, listen to this filth!" is a thing you might say to convince her to listen to this episode of The Firnecast! If she does, she will also hear some bad Willy Nelson impressions, a lengthy Prometheus rant, and she may end up feeling dirty afterwards... But it's worth it for a good laugh, Gramma!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast24/24firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 23 The FEARnecast!!! w/ guest Sarah Firnekas

It's time for a super spooky episode of your very favorite podcast!!! We talk about sinister double mustaches, how to make alien repellent, and the piercing God gave you. Also, Mandy and Sarah reveal the many, many bizarre things they're scared of, thus creating a new fear: that everyone now knows what they're scared of. Beware this episode, for it will chill your penis to the core!!!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast23/23firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 22 Deliver Us From Carman

This week we talk about the beast in your pants, Dan's beef with the 5-0, squirrel nuts, and introduce a new segment called "Things That Warped Us." Be warned, if you are a fan of exceedingly cheesy Christian rap music from the 80's or are a Jewish man-witch, you will super offended by this episode. Love you!!!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast22/22firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 21 A Taste of Bonaduce w/ guest Sarah Frary

This week's super-sized episode marks the return of our beloved guest, world-famous tattoo artist Sarah Frary! We explore such topics as what it would be like if Tolkien dropped acid on your behind, ghost boners, chin hairs, and Mandy's innocence gets murdered to death. Friends, enjoy this with your ears, and please, PLEASE do not involve your eyes by Googling any of the topics discussed on this here episode. Seriously don't, you will barf. Also, Mandy sucks. Big time!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast21/21firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 20 Kangaroo Pouch of Love

What's it like inside a kangaroo pouch? Turns out, it's kinda gooey. You'll hear all about this, plus some tiny sailors, mind nuggets, the dreaded Bacon Apocalypse, and Dr. FrankenPhil. Also, Dan coins the phrase "thrill humping." We love you! Love us back with your ears!!! P.S. Mandy sucks! HA HA HA!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast20/20firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 19 The Mushroom of Dusk

We may be in a post Alien Al slump, but we can still throw down a joke or two.  We prove it by "cocking" about things, hypothetical porn shops, and the magic that can happen when you throw random objects at your pet.  Enjoy it with your ears!!!

http://archive.org/download/TheFirnecast19/19firnecastfinal.mp3 

Ep. 18 Chip & Lope w/ guest Alien Allen

Warning: You may end up with no guts after listening to this episode because you have laughed them out. That is a fact. And you can't argue with the fact that we engage in the most awesome and epic Karaoke Rap Battle of all time, talk UFO's with Alien Al, and look at you with our zombie eyes. We also talk about hamburger crotches, squeezy graves, and get a serious case of the giggles. http://archive.org/download/Firnecast18/18firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 17 You Are Erect w/ guest "Buffalo" Joe Barbuto

Has Dan ever been abducted by aliens? Find out (kind of) on this week's episode!!! You will also be hearing about confused old people and their drug habits, casual limo driving, and surprise hypnotism.  Joe Barbuto did not approve this message, in fact, he may even repudiate it.

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast17/17firnecastfinal.mp3 

Ep. 16 Vagina Dentata

On this week's episode we talk ankles, improv, and giant trucker butts.  We will forever ruin a beautiful song for you, stand up for women's topless rights, and interview famed grumpy traveler Kyle Weaver for another addition of "Places to Avoid." We'll make you giggle if you let us, so do that!!!

http://archive.org/download/TheFirnecastEpisode16/16firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 15 Monkey Ballin'

"It's always genitals." -Dan Firnekas (also, we do some judging, learn about 'looners, and name Mandy's microphone after a royal body part) You will LOVE this maybe!!! http://archive.org/download/Firnecast15/15firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 14 Boners, Beavers, and Randy Travis

Please allow your humble podcast hosts to take you on an audio journey through an Olympic rower's pants, surviving a rabid beaver attack, and what comes next when Randy Travis gets naked... We'll also tell you when it's appropriate to whip out your boobs and issue some kill on sight orders. You're welcome!

http://archive.org/download/Episode14_964/14firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 13 Nowoodstock Preview!!! w/ Pat O'Brien

That's right friends, it is Nowoodstock time in our fair land!!!!!! We're giving you a preview of our amazing local music festival with its co-creator, Pat O'Brien... We talk a little music, a little (okay, a lot) penis-shaped animals, and a little lengthy uncomfortable hugging... Oh don't worry, we also talk about kicking old ladies in the face and stopping traffic with sex dolls!!! Get it in your ears!!!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast13/13firnecastfinal.mp3 

Dark and Hard w/ guest Sarah Frary

Ready to get a little wild and crazy this week??? I knew you were... Hang on tight for a wet and wild audio adventure with tattoo artist/artist/reluctant ghost expert Sarah Frary!!! Old man penis tattoos, the joys of larping, local porn freaks, and maybe even a little bit of pickle knowledge will be dropped inside your brain this week. LOVE IT!!! Or don't, but please pretend you do.

http://archive.org/download/Episode12_37/12firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 11 Two Angry Breasts w/ guest Sarah Firnekas

Welcome to a very special episode of The Firnecast!!! The meaningful topics covered in this week's podcast include such things as comedy cherries, how to get a date with a goat, the oddness of the goods in Alaska, Sarah's bosoms, and much, much more... Give it a listen, won't you?

http://archive.org/download/Episode11_472/11firnecastfinal.mp3

FIRNECAST PROBLEMS!!!

Hello our darling, amazing, wonderful, perfect little pod friends!!! We are so so so very sorry to announce that due to circumstances beyond our control, we are forced to release this episode of the podcast a day late.  We will be delivering it to your little ears tomorrow afternoon rather than today.  We are so sorry, and please friends, get ready to download some Firnecast goodness tomorrow.  We love you with all our hearts and thank you for being so awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ep. 10 The Unwanted Penis w/ guest Todd Misomelius

Are you ready to hear the dirtiest Firnecast yet??? I certainly hope so, because unwanted penises, propositioning a former teacher, and putting parts of your podcast inside a Kardashian are just a few of the highly inappropriate subjects you'll be hearing about this week... If you DARE!!! Can you count the wayward Todd burps? We suggest making a drinking game out of it! Oh please enjoy, pretty please!!!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast10/10firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 9 Pepperoni Nipples w/ Roscoe Lee Snider

Get your fill of hot nipple action, big lady loving, and non-cow Wyoming music on this week's Firnecast! Our guest is local man about town, very first musical guest, and all around super cool beard brother Roscoe Lee Snider. If you listen closely, you might even hear about some ball hungry mer-people and the difference between doodling and tutel-ing! Join us, won't you? ♥

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast09_401/9firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 8 Boooooobs!!! w/ Kyle Weaver

Get an earful of BOOOOOOBS this week on The Firnecast!!! Not to mention fun stuff like FirneCats, porn headaches, and smelly travel destinations. You will like this probably!!! (o)(o)

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast08/8firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 7 Cool Lessons & Jazz Hands

What's the wrong kind of loophole? What are internal jazz hands? What does it sound like when Mandy gets slapped in the face? Why would I need to know Matt Lauer's cup size? These are the questions you'll be asking yourself if you don't tune in to this week's episode of The Firnecast... So do that!!!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast07/7firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 6 Aliens w/ Allen pt. 2, with special guest The Viking Helmet

Look out, world, it's Aliens w/ Allen part 2!!! Dry out your pants and get ready to wet them again as you listen to true tales of UFO encounters straight from the Wyoming plains!!! Also, we address the controversy surrounding the Firnecast 40, Dad wears a Viking helmet, we talk about the innocent Chinese and their buried s-e-x toys, and ever so much more. Join us on this audio adventure, won't you?

http://archive.org/download/Episode06_317/6firnecast.mp3

Ep. 5 Dirty Birds and Squinches w/ Jessica Tharp

Dirty birds, pengwenises, and a whole lotta squinching are coming your way on this week's Firnecast!  Plus, "helpful" hints on how to start a race war with mermaids, win friends with dimes, and Doomsday prepping with Jessica Tharp. You might not regret listening to this!!!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast05/5firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 4 Devil Stove vs. Jesus Mold

An epic battle of good vs. evil, Devil stove vs. Jesus Mold... Who will win?  Find out in this episode of The Firnecast!  Old man duck butts, sibling violence, Mandy's stand up comedy debut, and the announcement of an amazing contest, plus other stuff... Like the ever-nearing End Days caused by Zombie Apocalypse. Enjoy!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast04/4firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 3 Wiggle Stick Reunion w/ Jamy Cabre

Depraved birds, Zombie Apocalypse, dumb peanut-eaters, and the long-awaited reunion of "famed" Ten Sleep band Wiggle Stick (including a humiliating rendition of their "hit" song Friday Night), this is an hour of your life you'll never get back! But you won't mind much. Our guest this week is belly-dancing nurse extraordinaire Jamy Cabre.

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast03/3firnecastfinal.mp3

Ep. 2 Gettin' Explicit with Allen Firnekas

Episode 2: Our guest is Allen Firnekas, local man of mystery and spawn-er of your illustrious hosts.  Topics include true UFO stories that might make you wet your pants, a rubber butt update, hypnotism gone awry, and face punching 10 year olds... We hope you enjoy!

http://archive.org/download/Firnecast02/2firnecast.mp3

Firnecast 01 with Todd Misomelius

This week's episode is the very first itty bitty baby Firnecast!  Our guest is town man/local hero Todd Misomelius.  Topics include pervy Japanese vending machines, mean dance chaperones, sensual buffalo dancing, and God's behind.  Enjoy!  Please!

P.S. Our amazing intro/outro music is by Hillbilly Herald.  They were so kind as to give us their permission to use it and we are eternally grateful.  Check them out and download on Itunes! 

http://archive.org/download/TheFirnecast01/firnecastfinal.mp3

 

Firnecast 01 with Todd Misomelius

This week's episode is the very first itty bitty baby Firnecast!  Our guest is town man/local hero Todd Misomelius.  Topics include pervy Japanese vending machines, mean dance chaperones, sensual buffalo dancing, and God's behind.  Enjoy!  Please!

P.S. Our amazing intro/outro music is by Hillbilly Herald.  They were so kind as to give us their permission to use it and we are eternally grateful.  Check them out and download on Itunes!

http://archive.org/details/TheFirnecast01
62.6 MB

Welcome to the Firnecast!!!

It's happening, it's really happening... The inaugural podcast will be going up on Itunes this Friday for you to stick in your ear holes.  And I think you're gonna like it.  Or I hope you will.  This week our guest is Todd Misomelius, the town man in Ten Sleep and all around hobo fire lighting badass.  If you like people talking over each other and the hilarity that ensues, you're going to love this episode.  We get into some weird news, weird stories, a little bit of local color, and even a sprinkling of  religion (in a funny way).  A little disclaimer, we talk about all kinds of stuff, some of which you might deem inappropriate... I have no way of knowing what you think is inappropriate, so if you're a sensitive soul, perhaps this isn't for you.  Oh, don't worry, it's nothing that bad, just a few rubber butts and cuss words.  Anyway, I hope you enjoy our little comedy podcast, and if you do please follow us on Twitter @firnecast, be sure to subscribe on Itunes, and write a review.  Rumor has it that the ratings on Itunes are determined by a combination of downloads and reviews, so do that.  If we get famous, we're taking you all with us!!!  It's gonna be champagne and smelly cheeses from here on out!!!  Podcast to stardom!!!

Mandy